calvin
In my Animal Communication Workshops I offer a segment on Requesting Behavior Changes. Of course the workshop provides a lot more in-depth information, but I wanted to share an idea from the workshop that you can apply with your own animal friends.
Animals do not have the same culture as we do. You acting unhappy or telling your animal that the situation is "making" you unhappy, will not motivate change. They will perceive your mood as related to who you are being at that moment, not as a commentary on them. In other words they will look at you and think, "Unhappy person", not, "Oh look how my behavior is upsetting them". They will not hold themselves accountable for your unhappiness because animals don't believe that they control human moods.
This might be confusing because you have experienced animals offering you comfort when you are sad. They are offering a behavior that makes sense to them- being loving- but they are still not believing that they "control" your mood.
So, if you are wanting to change a situation the first step is getting emotionally in sync with what you want. If you want peace when two cats are fighting; then FEEL peaceful. If you want your dog to be less scared; then FEEL confident and calm. After you achieve the emotional state you can move on to communicating what you want with your animal. (Getting the emotional part without the communication can result in behavior changes.)
Postscript: I am not offering workshops lately but I do have my book, Animal Whispers: A four week course in animal communication available on my website.